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♥Jess♥

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High School Years "Time of your life" [
Tuesday
June 2nd, 2009 at 3:32pm
]
It's 12:45am and I am unable to sleep. The sheets on my bed are unusually scratchy and I find myself dancing with the covers as I are cold one minute, and blazing hot the next. My mind begins to wonder as I lie awake in my bed anticipating what events may take place within a few hours. "Will you meet new friends? Will you get picked on? How different is Middle school from high school? Are there going to be 'Wall-to-Wall' boys as mom explains high school?" In the midst of my contemplating and dreaming, the radio blasts with the morning news. My body literally convults into the air in desperation to hush the damn thing. As my eyes come into focus, I notice the red lighting on my alarm clark shows 5:30. Holy cow. It's already 5:30 in the morning! Did I sleep at all? Exhausted, yet a little excited, I toss my legs over from the side of my bed and begin my regular middle school daily routine. But, wait a minute. I'm in high school now...I can't live up to my old ways. I have to create a new routine. So in my pause, I am standing in my room planning my new mornings. I shake myself of this thought and decide I better get a move on things or I will be late for my first day of high school.

High school is a learning lesson in life. Almost everyone goes through high school and at least half of the people in your freshman class graduate with you. High school is confusing, exhiliarating, horrible, wonderful, busy, boring, and so much more. For myself, high school wasn't the worst thing in my life but yet one of the best year's in my life. I have watched and discussed high school with various groups of people and the main conclusion is this: You get in high school, what you want to put forth and what you actually put forth.

My high school life was pretty hectic, yet I wouldn't trade it for anything. Between the experience and the situations I was put in, I have learned more than the average student attending high school.

Was I the president of the class? No. Was I valedictorian? No. Was I the jock? No. Was I the Homecoming Queen. Yes...
So let me guess, right off the bat, as the reader you probably think I am some dumb blonde rich girl who dated the high school football star and Mommy and Daddy bought her car...blah blah blah. That, I can say no to. Actually the complete opposite of all of that.

Everyone has their issues. And no, I am not talking about scratching a blackberry or the iMac freezing. In high school and life in general, no one is perfect. As rule #1 in my book, you must love yourself and all your flaws. I know, I know. You probably said, "That's dumb." I will be completely honest, some people in high school probably considered me as "perfect" or "very fortunate" but it's how you take yourself and how you decide to portray yourself. Did I feel perfect or very fortunate in high school? Hell no! But I made the best of everyday and everyone around me.

I met this woman a few weeks ago who attended my alma mater. We'll call her Alese. Alese was a much thicker woman and didn't look like a high school senior. Alese had this poise about herself: she was very happy with who she was and didn't care what others thought of her. Alese was very welcoming with her smile and always had something positive to say, even if it was a negative situation. I realized that day, that most people are missing the importance on life or even in high school.

Let's take another example. You meet this person as a child and grow up with her. She is a great friend and is very nice to you. You guys eventually start becoming best friends where you tell eachother secrets and your personal life. You never have a fight a day in your life! Then your best friend starts hanging out with some of your other friends. This isn't a big deal to you because all of you guys can be friends. Or so you are led to believe. Hannah was the best friend. Hannah started hanging out with Michelle and soon enough, Michelle starts ignoring you. Why is this? What happened? Michelle becomes better friends with Hannah and now Hannah doesn't come around all the time. This tactic of a person is what I like to call the "Bitch Tactic." This type of situation happens a lot in high school. In fact, this happened to one of my best friends. All of her best friends eventually turned their back on her because of what this one person was telling them. Luckily, my best friend still woke up everyday, put her cheerful face on, and still faced these girls every single day until she graduated.

There is a quote about when Life gives you lemons, make lemonade. I would like to refer it as when Life gives you lemons, drink the lemonade and show how much power it can give you. Negativity is still energy that just needs to be recycled. If negativity is given to you, recycle it and use it to your best advantage. My best friend may not know this now, but will understand that she drank the lemonade and ended out to be the "bigger person" in this situation. Rule #2 in my book is Only YOU can let yourself feel the way you do. Many people can make you try and feel different things or emotions but only YOU have the power to succumb to those feelings.

I've been out of high school for quite some time and still deal with "Negative Lemons." You will deal with these types of people and emotions constantly in your life. My motive for this besides recycling that energy is to 'Kill 'em with kindness.' People will say anything and everything to make you as miserable as they are.

To be continued....
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[
Thursday
January 25th, 2007 at 11:44pm
]
Wow, it's been a very long time since I've wrote in here...
I figured I would write because I have a lot on my mind.
I'm not sure if I should write in here or keep things to myself.
I hate the fact that my best friend is a million miles away, and the fact that he might not go to FGCU and the fact that I might switch from FGCU and the fact that we may not get married in a few years because of all the switching and long distancing and I don't even know where to start. I can't talk to him right now because Im bawling my eyes out. This is supposed to be my perfect life, everything is great, until this comes up. Why does life have to be difficult?

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I created a Slide Show! Check it out! [
Tuesday
October 17th, 2006 at 3:13pm
]
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[
Monday
December 19th, 2005 at 8:09pm
]
[ mood | annoyed ]


"Everything happens for a reason"

"Maybe it's better this way"

I'm trying to convince myself that things are fine when they aren't.

Vacation was good, was on the phone with Dylan a lot but it helped passed the time...
While on vacation my baby dog Gretchen passed away. (12/12/05) She was 13 years old and very VERY important to me. I practically grew up with her and I'm still putting off grieving. Dylan has helped a lot by being around me even more and constantly to get my mind off from it.

I'm in love, I really am and apparently it's driving everyone nuts.
I'm sorry if I feel this way...
And I'm sorry if I can't live the perfect life you guide me to live.
I'm only human and I make mistakes too.

Today's not been the greatest.
I'm gonna go try to do something productive.
<3 me
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[
Friday
October 21st, 2005 at 3:53pm
]
[ mood | loved ]

..So In Love With Dylan Collier Drake...

Good luck with the hurricane, I'm taking Dylan with me... :)
Just kidding about taking him.
Take Care!

XoXo
Jess

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[
Friday
September 30th, 2005 at 12:09am
]
[ mood | loved ]

When you love something or someone you wouldn't dare challenge yourself by loosing them. But sometimes you have to let go of the things that you love to see if they are true to you... What happens when fate comes into play and there still is a what if in question when you never thought there would be a "what if" ever again?

Life is great right now, minus the whole relationship part but I think I've got that covered or at least managed right now :)

Homecoming was the best, I got on Court which was totally excited because a couple of my good friends got on as well as MY LITTLE SISTER FOR FRESHMEN!!!...Homecoming game was cancelled which sucked! But I guess life goes on...

Homecoming night was a blast. I was crowned Queen which was shocking for me to take in, didn't really think that I was ever gonna get on Court let alone Queen!! and Nate got King :) Couple of people went to Cholies after... that night made me realize A LOT thanks for making it a blast to all of my family and friends, and him...

I will never forget this past Homecoming :)

Love you'z!
XoXo
Fenskerz

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[
Sunday
August 14th, 2005 at 1:23am
]
Hey everyone!
If you live in the Cape Coral region I suggest that you come to the Pre-Season Volleyball Jamboree which is being held at Cape High. It's going to be loads of fun and I'm ecstatic to play in the tournament.

The Jamboree is on Tuesday, August 16th.

Ida Bakers and Mariner Play against eachother at 5 i believe and then Cape Coral (the team I'm on) and North Fort Myers play at 7.

So if you can be there, It's gonna be hott...promise :)
And support us!

Message me if you have any questions!
Thanks!
XoXo
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[
Sunday
August 7th, 2005 at 12:22pm
]
[ mood | sympathetic ]

RIP Anna Marie Randazzo

Elementary school is a blurr
Middle school is a bit more clear
Especially 6th grade
When we were best friends
We were like a little clique of our own
Jess, Britt, and Anna
...And the Journal
I'm sure Britt still has it.
Anna Marie -- Such a sweetheart
We'd always have crossword puzzle races
Very artistic, and so reserved
She had so much going for her
But she will never be forgotten, ever...
Rest in peace Anna Marie, We love you.

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[
Thursday
August 4th, 2005 at 1:22am
]
[ mood | blah ]

When all else fails...turn to my sistersCollapse )

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[
Thursday
June 23rd, 2005 at 11:44am
]
[ mood | awake ]

Hmmm, I have to go to the Post Office today, and the Library...I need to get gas and go to work from 7-11.
How exciting my day is! I'm Really Bored! Ithink I'll post some pictures~

So i found out some friends are in the hospital and I'm just kind of waiting to find out news about them.
I'm soo scared for their familys, and for them.

XoXo

 

Summer Love QuizCollapse )

6 comments|post comment

[
Wednesday
June 8th, 2005 at 12:48pm
]
Volleyball was fun today, we didn't have many girls show up...

But we still made the most of it.

Ash did pretty good, I dusted the cobwebs LoL.

Just trying to see how my journal is turning out.

Love me
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[
Wednesday
June 8th, 2005 at 12:38pm
]
[ mood | content ]

So I'm going to wipe my slate clean

and Start All Over.

It's summer, my last summer as a high schooler, and I'm done with it all.

Comment to be added!

XoXo

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